Once upon a time in a tropical paradise, there was a carefree mom living a fantasy with her 5 wonderfully perfect cherubs. Basking in the sun on the sugary-white sandy beach, she sighed a long sigh, allowing the gentle breeze to carry her troubles from a far-off land of chaos, dysfunction, and deceit away forever. Never before has she been so grateful to watch her darlings frolic in the crystal blue sparkling water and listen to their precious laughter. The end-
If only… That sounds like your typical theatrical ending to an oppressed woman’s triumph over her controlling husband. But this isn’t a movie; this is real life. And in real life transitions are not a piece of cake ending on a beautiful beach paradise. In real life, single parenting is a struggle too, even after the calamity of an abusive home has been washed away or– especially after.
Learning how to transition from being a married mom working part-time from home to a single mom and sole provider working outside of the home full-time comes with a whole new set of challenges. The chapters of my life seem more like separate books altogether when I look back over the last 4 decades. Oh, did I forget to mention, that woman is me.
With the weight of the world on my shoulders and no one to back me up, I questioned myself constantly. Dark places of my mind were visited and more than once I almost cracked. Five beating hearts and ten wide eyes looked to me morning, noon, and night. But the big fat scary collection of things that could’ve brought me to my ultimate demise was the very thing that offered me the opportunity to shine. The choice was mine. Those ten hopeful eyes and five love-bursting hearts held my focus in every decision along the way reminding me to be the protagonist parent that I was.
Hello & warm welcome to the True You Solutions parent coaching website! I am Rebecca-Ann Nolan, the protagonist parent of five boys who, despite the tumults we faced during the trials of domestic violence, divorce, and relocation, miraculously managed to motivate and encourage my children to maintain high honors in school, keep up with their daily chores, get jobs as teenagers, and receive scholarships for college. Though it may sound like a superhero parenting story, I can assure you at no point did it feel that way. In fact, I felt anything but courageous and secure. Fear gnawed at me in every waking moment. Inadequacy ruled my self-image not being able to provide nicer things for my children. Insecurity dominated my mind, and a heavy blanket of anger nestled it all together. But above all the relentless fear-based thoughts and feelings, I possessed the conviction and fortitude rooted in the Love for my children to persevere for their sake and the sake of their futures and that is what a protagonist parent is. One who makes decisions rooted in Love rather than Fear.
Owner of True You Solutions since 2010, I am a certified positive discipline parent educator providing frustrated and overwhelmed parents and teachers with the skills and tools required to strengthen the relationship with their children and transform chaos into order. Whether you are single or married, have a dysfunctional past, or a dysfunctional present or neither, my style of coaching BUILDS UP protagonist parents & teachers. You already are one, maybe you just don’t know it, yet. Many of your everyday decisions are rooted in Love while only a few are stress induced. Positive discipline techniques are simple and effective ways of parenting through stressful situations. Perhaps joining a workshop is exactly what you need to awaken the protagonist parent inside of you. There’s only one way to find out!